Hollywood Hot Flash Rescue & La Meno with Sisters: Actress Sandra Flores & Business Manager Kelly Bruce
Episode Details
Transcript
In this engaging podcast episode, Andrea speaks with Sandy and Kelly about their backgrounds, careers, and the cultural influences that shaped their lives. They discuss the challenges of navigating careers, the importance of family traditions, and the impact of aging on women in film.
Sandy shares her journey from studying translation to pursuing a career in acting, while Kelly talks about her work in eco-conscious building management. The conversation also touches on the significance of maintaining cultural heritage and the evolving beauty standards in the entertainment industry.
In this engaging conversation, Sandra and Kelly share their experiences navigating the complexities of life, including the challenges of menopause, the importance of sisterhood, and the value of self-care. They discuss how empathy and support play crucial roles in their lives, both personally and professionally, and emphasize the need for open conversations about women's health issues. The discussion also touches on the joys of aging, pursuing passions, and the significance of prioritizing one's well-being.
Andrea also shares some of her favourite skincare recommendations:
Treatments
RF Facials
Mesotherapy
Botox
Dr Komathy / The Lifestyle Clinic
Makeup remover:
BioDerma Micellar Water for sensitive skin
Cleanser:
Dermalogica Special Cleansing Gel
Exfoliant:
Dermalogica Daily Microfoliant
Skin Inc Oxy-Recharge Bubble Mask
Toner:
QMS MEDICOSMETICS Hydrating Toner
Serum:
Moisturizer:
Dermalogica Skin Smoothing Cream
QMS MEDICOSMETICS COLLEGEN 3D Cream
Eye cream:
SuperGoop Bright-Eyed Mineral Eye Cream SPF 40
Sunscreen:
COOLA Classic Face Sunscreen Fragrance-Free SPF50
Eucerin Sun Anti-Shine Control Face Sunscreen with SPF 50 | Mattifying Sunscreen
Note: some links we may make a wee profit from.
Connect with Sandra and Kelly
Sandra’s scene on The Glass Castle
Connect with The F*CK You 50s
YouTube
Speaker 0
Let me start off first by saying thank you so much to everybody who has been listening to my podcast and to those who voted for me for the podcast awards. I was a semifinalist and a finalist. Alas, I did not win, which I know that I should be proud of. Hey, I've managed to start a podcast and be nominated within six months, but I'm unreasonably a sore loser. I'll grow up eventually. There is still time. Anyway, so I'm going to try something new here and talk a little bit about my skin care and specifically what I do for my skin. If you go to the show notes I will have all this listed for you, so don't worry about pulling over if you're driving or dropping sparky's leash to make notes. I got you. I would say probably my most frequented asked question is about my skin and what do I do. And in the words of my vet last week, what did you do to your face? You look younger. I had makeup on that day for a bit of a change. I know I'm a makeup artist but I don't always wear makeup. First of all, in true transparency I have not been without various aesthetic services over the years, which I'll drop into the show notes as well To name a few, Optene facials of various kinds, RF and Hydra facials are my faves. Thermage, mesotherapy, alt therapy, multiple peels, Botox. I've never had fillers. I have never seen anyone with a filler that I have liked. No judgment if they are for you. I was lucky when I was living in Singapore as I had a friendship with an aesthetic doctor who occasionally gave me a gratis treatment because of the amount of clients she gained from my constant recommendations. And if you're listening in Singapore, Doctor. Kumati at the lifestyle clinic is the best. Unfortunately, I have yet to find my person in Toronto. No one has blown my mind here yet, unless you count the nurse who injected the wrong muscle causing my middle brow to sag Cro Magnon style. I mean that was kind of blowing my mind in an odd way, and fitting as a red haired neander. Thank goodness I could rock a fringe, and Botox is not forever. Anyway, on to at home skin care. I do look for pharmaceutical grade active ingredients in my skin care as they have a documented effect on the skin, often with a healing treatment based benefit. Pharmaceutical grade refers to a level of purity and quality, and this is why I look for skin care with these ingredients. My skin care steps don't always include everything, and by that I mean sometimes I'm simply using my cleanser and moisturizer, and other times it's a twelve step process. Here are my top shelf skincare products. And just to note, no one has paid to be on this list, but I have received packages from various brands in the past. So if they've made it to the list it's because I truly love them and I see the benefits for myself. Okay number one on the list makeup remover. Bioderma micellar water for sensitive skin. I love this for gently removing makeup and it doesn't clog your pores, it's non oily. I use this in my kit as well, my professional makeup kit. I love it so much. It's really great. Cleanser. Dermalogica special cleansing gel for washing my face, and I believe in the double cleanse, which means you wash your face and then you wash it again. Exfoliating is one step that I'm surprised that many either never do or do incorrectly. Exfoliating helps remove dead skin cells so your skin absorbs all of your skin care better. And honestly, if you have dull skin, bumping up your exfoliating routine probably will reveal a healthy radiant skin. Avoid any harsh facial scrubs that have apricot seeds or the like. They are incredibly abrasive and destroy your skin and your skin's protective barrier layer. This is a rule for all ages. It's not the 80s anymore, and we know better. The only time I'd say recommend this is like, you know, if you run into someone who has been mean to you and they compliment your skin tell them how much you love apricot seed scrub and you use it every fucking day. But for you, regardless of the exfoliator, do not use it every day. So my exfoliant recommendations would be Dermalogica daily microfoliant. Okay so I know what it says, but in my opinion do not use it daily. And Skin Inks Oxy Recharge Bubble Mask. My faves. Last time I was in Singapore I stocked up on the skin ink, I'm ending my reserves now. Toner. Okay. I literally have multiple on my shelf. First, if you still have sea breeze, girl, you're as old as that product, throw it out. Toner should not be an astringent. We don't want to burn off our protective barrier layer. Toners help to target and calm the skin as well as add hydration. QMS Medi Cosmetics hydrating toner is my preferred at the moment. Note that if your skin is feeling tight when you cleanse you may need to revamp what you're using at home. Your skin should never feel tight and sore when you wash it. It's a good time to mention that if you have any skin issues, it could be hormones, it could be related to barrier, repair needed, honestly there could be a plethora of things even even change of season, even allergies. So it's good to see a dermatologist or a skin therapist. Don't ever try to self diagnose your skin by reading fashion magazines or, god forbid, listening to some bloody TikToker talking about skin care. Oh, shutter. Please don't do that. Please please please don't do that. Serums. Okay. I know I'm probably sending high maintenance now. Right? Rhetorical. I am. I know. I get it. Okay. I love I love me a good serum. I always reevaluate mine when I finish a bottle in order to target my needs as our skin's needs do change. It can change with seasons, stress, climate, hormones, and so on. My favorite serum is the daily dose by Skin Inc. They have a bespoke bar where you can add in your desired targets. Licorice, hyaluronic acid, and q ten was an Andrea Claire classic, but they are in Singapore and hard to ship to Canada. For a less of a bespoke kind of tincture, but more accessible, The Ordinary has fantastic options. Remember that serum goes under your moisturizer as it won't absorb through your creams, and your creams really help to lock them in. My go to moisturizers are, well Dermalogica skin smoothing cream, Love, and QMS Medi Cosmetics collagen three d cream. These are fantastic for skin that is dehydrated, losing elasticity, and collagen. And don't forget your neck that is so important! I feel my savior has been in the fact that I would get facials often and the facialists would work on my neck. Otherwise, I'd be giving real serious Christmas turkey neck waddle right now. Christmas because I'm an upmarket turkey eye creams. So I'm a lover of pharmaceutical grade ingredients as I've stated, but I do love the Supergoop bright eyed mineral eye cream that has an SPF of forty. They do have actives in this eye cream, but honestly I'm not sure if they're pharmacy grade. And at this point I kind of don't care, like I'm okay with that. I do I do really like the Supergoop one. Sunscreen. And, yes, if your foundation has sunscreen, you still need a separate one. Stop asking dumb questions. No. Just kidding. There is no stupid question. Doesn't matter what my grade ten English teacher said. He also hated my shoulder pads. Fuck him. Coola classic face sunscreen fragrance free SPF fifty. I love their spray on to reapply over makeup. Or my latest fave is, by Eucerin, and I'm always wondering if I actually pronounce that brand name correctly. Anyway, Eucerin, anti shine control face sunscreen with SPF fifty. It's a mattifying sunscreen, and I love this because of the mattifying properties. It, started off actually my male grooming kit, and it made its way into my personal arsenal. And this is really great for people if you, feel that you have oily skin, definitely. Or if you like a glowy makeup, but you don't wanna have, like, layered of, like, lots of glowy products on, then the mattifying sunscreen is perfect. And your sunscreen is your last skincare step before your makeup. Now I do use various masks for deep calming and hydration in the form of sheet masks, gels, creams, etc. I won't list them now, but I will add a few of my faves into the show notes. Sheet masks you can use daily, and then a deeper mask generally depends on your skin type, but once a week is definitely perfect. I don't use any powder on my skin, and people cringe when I say that but and they say like I don't want to look oily. The thing is if you're using proper skin care for your skin type you can control your oily skin. Most who use powder overdo it because you see the oil and you're like oh my god I need to powder that down, but when you powder too often you're actually telling your sebaceous glands that your skin is dry and it needs to provide more oil. So then you're kind of creating this endless cycle of oil production on your skin. The other thing that I find with powder is it tends to dull the skin because it builds up, and I don't care if you're like I use x product and it doesn't do that. Yeah it does. I'm sorry I hate to tell you, but yes it does. Too much powder on the skin too, especially if you're reapplying through the day. It starts to kind of, like, it starts to make you look kind of flat, pale. It fills in all the fine lines. So you start off, you know, say in the morning looking like you're thirty eight, and, you know, by the time the afternoon rolls around, you're looking sixty because you're putting on too much powder. So yeah. So, lady, put down that powder. Oh my gosh. I need more sleep because I get silly when I have not slept. I guess I have some other makeup tips, but I figure like let's save makeup for the next one. In the meantime, feel free to DM me with any questions, even your dumb ones. Yeah, I mean there's no dumb questions because asking questions show that you have a level of intelligence and you're open minded and you're interested in learning. And, hey, let's be interested people. Welcome to the Fuck You Fifties, The podcast for women who refuse to tolerate the bullshit anymore. This is real talk, real stories, and a long overdue reality check. I'm your host, Andrea Clare, and this podcast is the filter free voice you've been waiting for with a dose of f bombs, the fuck you fifties, unfiltered, unapologetic, and undeniably needed. Ode to the Gemini. Yep. It's another twofer episode. My guests today are sisters in blood and no blood. Sorry. That's a really tasteless menopause joke. Anyway, Sandra Flores and Kelly Bruce are Uruguayan Canadian sisters supporting each other through the ups and downs of life. Sandra is a Toronto based actor who holds a bachelor of arts in drama studies from Glendon College, York University. She is also a Second City Conservatory graduate. She is a mom to a brilliant sixteen year old daughter who is also a kick ass drummer. Sandra's most recent credits include Law and Order Toronto, SkyMed and various voices on Wynonna Earp Tales from Purgatory. Kelly is a business manager at an eco conscious consulting firm in Toronto and a mom of two very successful adults. Forever friends, they share much in common as they navigate through their fifties. We discussed the 80s influence of fad diets the adults around us got into which included wrapping up in saran wrap under jogging suits to sweat off the lbs. How their Uruguayan elders wanted the younger generation to color their gray hair because it made them feel old, Sandra's menopause hot flash experience on set shooting a scene with an a list actor and more up now. Sandra and Kelly, welcome to the fuck you fifties. Thank you guys so much. It's so lovely to see you both. Speaker 1
Lovely to see you. Speaker 2
Thanks for having us. Speaker 0
Yeah. I'm so excited to have you on my podcast. I really appreciate it. So Sandra and I, Sandy and I know each other from, I almost said from school, but our daughter's school. So, Presley, Sandy's daughter, and my daughter Zoe go to the Etobicoke School of the Arts. They're both in grade eleven. And so we met, kind of, you know, just, I guess, as being parents and Presley is in film and Zoe's in musical theater. And, now they're both also in a band together. Speaker 1
I can't wait for the show that we're allowed to go to. Speaker 0
Okay. No offense, but enough about our children because this is not us. It's not even kids, but you know, we're not. Speaker 1
We're called push pin. Speaker 2
Push pin. Speaker 0
Push pin. Yeah. Push pin the band. Okay. Here. Enough. Speaker 1
Moving on. Speaker 0
What I, what I love is that Sandy and I are both like, we're both in the industry and we're both like taking the role of, like, stage parents, like, really, really well. Right? And, Kelly, I guess you could be a stage aunt. Right? Speaker 2
So I'm just gonna close my window Speaker 0
Yeah. Speaker 2
Because I can hear the traffic, Speaker 1
and I can't hear it properly. We're rock deaf from the nineties. Speaker 0
Okay. For me, it was always the eighties loud music. I used to, like, at dances and things. I don't know why, but I would always go and stand, like, right in front of the speaker. Like, that's that's, like, I don't know. Did I think I was cool or something? And then I mean, now we're hearing it in my right ear. So, I mean, they said it was an autoimmune disorder, but maybe it was, like, the eighties, like, speaker. Speaker 1
Yeah. I carry earplugs everywhere I go. Speaker 0
Yeah. So smart. So smart. So, so Sandy, tell, tell, tell our listeners a little bit about you and then Kelly, don't forget, we'll we'll jump into you too, but Sandy, give us a little breakdown about what you do. Speaker 1
What I do, besides mom ing, I do acting, which I absolutely love. I I went to university for translation and ended up in the theater, and I wouldn't leave. So I walked out of there with a a drama studies BA instead. Speaker 0
I didn't know you went through for initially for translation. Speaker 1
Yeah. Well, when I when I first wanted to go to university, my parents were like, why? You're just going to get married and have kids. That's your, that's your. Speaker 0
Oh, they, they were expecting you to have your MRS degree. Speaker 1
Oh yeah. There's no, there was no going to university. The only way I could really talk them into, into it was telling them that I wanted to go to Glendon College, which is York University's French campus, because I was French immersion and so spoke French. And then they're like, okay, okay then, you know, and my dad was in the print industry and it kind of he's like, well, that sounds like potential job. Yeah. So I went, and I didn't get into translation. I failed the entrance exam for translation. And at that time, when I met my advisor who was, the the head of the theater department and saw my transcript, he's like, why why aren't you in theater? And I said, I didn't know I could do that. So, so he's like, well, yeah, you can. So I stayed, with my parents still thinking I was working on my transformation degree. And then when I left there, it was really hard to they don't teach you about auditioning. They don't teach you about the industry at all. I was at, I wasn't at a typical theater school. I was at, like, an academic school, right? So it was more about Right. The history of theater. Even though I did get to act, there was a lot of acting. There was a lot of production. I learned everything from lighting to stage managing to just production to building sets. Like, we did everything. Cool. Yeah. Then it was really hard to audition. It was hard I did a few plays, but it was really, really hard. So I stuck with music. I could play guitar. I could sing. So I did my singer songwriting, years. And then not until Presley was four and in school full time, because it was full day, did the universe come back again and said, you know, I have an agent for you. So a friend of mine said, if you're looking for, a Latina, I know that you wanna get back at acting. Do you wanna go for this, it's like one of those, what do you call it? A docudrama, like a reenactment kind of show Speaker 0
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1
Paranormal witness. And so I went in and I auditioned, and the audition was, mostly improv. And I did so after university, I did keep doing stuff. So I did I did go through Second City. I went through the conservatory because I still wanted to keep it up. I took stand up. I wanted I I really enjoyed the, performance, aspect of stuff. So, so, yeah, I went in and I did the audition and I booked it. And then I went that same day, half an hour later, not even, went to meet the agent who sent me there and she, signed me, I guess. And then here we are twelve years later. Twelve years later, I've been with, with, Terry is her name. Speaker 0
So what what's the what's the math on that? So how old were you when you kind of got back into acting kinda more full time? Speaker 1
Forty something. Speaker 0
Like, math is hard. Speaker 1
Forty something? Speaker 0
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good answer. Let's stick with let's stick with forty something. That's good. And then and then, Kelly, what's what's so you you're you're working for an eco conscious? Speaker 2
I am. I'm currently working for a company that is trying to save the world by making, helping, I guess, owners and building managers, make their buildings green. So it's a bunch of, engineers. Yeah. But, but yeah. So that's what I'm doing currently. Speaker 0
Nice. And then did you guys you guys grew up in in Toronto? Did you grew up in Toronto? Speaker 2
Yep. We were born and raised in Speaker 1
I Speaker 2
well, I was born and raised in Toronto. Right? My sister as well. She came very young, but always in Toronto. Speaker 0
And then, and your background. So you're like, you're Gwen. You're you're Gwen. Am I saying that correctly? Speaker 1
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Perfect. You can remember that by, an episode from the citizens where Homer spins the globe and he lands on your way and he says, Luke, you are gay. So there you go. Speaker 0
Amazing. Okay. Yeah. Speaker 1
That's how Uruguay's name became. Speaker 0
So do you, do you guys find like growing up, did you have a lot of influence from your Uruguayan background? Speaker 1
A little bit. I, I, I feel like they really tried to be as Canadian as possible so that we could fit in. So, took on traditions that we don't do in your way, like Thanksgiving and Halloween and things like that that, you know, we they don't do. So, but they hopped right in there. My mom was always trying to learn English, always, taking classes. What else would you say about that? Oh, well, that club Uruguay. So there's this, community that would have picnics and dances. And I was even in a beauty pageant. They made me go on a beauty pageant for my club Uruguay. Speaker 0
That's amazing. Speaker 1
And so they they did try to keep that type of culture available to us. But as you got older, you know, and you could say, no. I wanna stay home. They wouldn't force you to go to those things. But at home, we it was always Spanish. Yeah. We always spoke Spanish at home. Our grandmothers would come to visit from your way. Eventually, they ended up moving here. So and they only spoke, Spanish. So, yeah, they would they did try to keep the language for sure. And some a lot of the food, of course. Speaker 2
Yeah. Yeah. Definitely the food. Speaker 1
The best empanadas are Uruguayan empanadas. I'm just gonna say no. Speaker 0
So what's the, what's the difference between an, Uruguayan empanada? And I mean, I guess how many different cultures do empanadas? Speaker 1
You know, it's funny because when you go to one of, my grand my my grandmother has passed now, my mom too, but when you'd go to their, the el pluede los abuelos, which is like the grandparents' club, and they would have these dances to raise funds for their trips and such, And they would have a list for the menu, and there'd be empanada, but, like, I don't know, about five or six, if not more, and then the country next to it. Yeah. So that you would order whether it was, like, the Colombian one, the Mexican one, the Argentinian. Argentinian in Uruguay is similar. Some people, they just put different things in them. Speaker 2
It's the dough. And the Speaker 1
and the dough because Speaker 0
I I make them. Speaker 2
I don't think my sisters ever made them. But I I Speaker 1
made them once. I made them once because the dough is difficult to make. Speaker 0
Oh, that's nice. Passed down like the and then was this a recipe that came kinda from your family as well? Or is Speaker 1
this yeah. Speaker 0
And, Kelly, you do remember my address. Right? So Speaker 2
Yes. I'll send you some of my empanadas. Speaker 1
The Uruguayan ones are baked. That's the that's the difference too. They're baked, whereas some of the other countries fried. Speaker 0
And are there different, like, heat? Like like, for temp like, the like, supper spicier than others or not really? Speaker 2
Yeah. That's the thing. You can do, like, whatever you want inside. Yeah. Yeah. And me being a Canadian Uruguayan, I, like, I even made a, I made, like, a leftover turkey one. Oh, yeah. So and not all the turkey fixing leftovers. So it's really your own creation, but I still use my mom's dough. Speaker 0
Whatever we can do to use it up. Speaker 2
Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Speaker 0
My family was always turkey soup, and my grandmother made the best, like, homemade noodles. And so I I love that, and I've kinda taught my kids how to do it, although they want me to make the the noodles. So Speaker 2
And my husband's from Newfoundland, and my son, he loves to he loves to cook the Uruguayan food. So his last empanada was a NuPhi mix. It was, Jig's dinner empanada, which it Jig's dinner is, like, a staple in Newfoundland. It's like cabbage, potato, salt, beef. And he made empanadas with the Yeah. With all of those fixing. So The Speaker 0
only thing I know about Newfoundland is, like, isn't that where you can kiss the screech or something? Yeah. Kiss the cod. Speaker 1
Yeah. Drink the screech. Speaker 2
Yeah. And drink the screech. Speaker 0
Oh, fun. So do you guys have any any like, from your upbringing, is there any kind of cultural traditions or kind of, like, thoughts towards aging that that is kind of that you've kind of grown up with, or do you find that it's more kind of Canadianized in that regard? Speaker 1
I do know when I started to let my hair go silver, the ladies had a problem with it for sure. And I think it's because it would make them look older. Speaker 0
That's so interesting. Speaker 1
I have a feeling that might have had something to do with it, but it was always, you know, you have to look a certain way for the men's. Yeah. And the men aren't gonna like that. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2
Yeah. Our, yeah, our mom was constantly saying, you know, you can cover up those grays. Yeah. It looks so lovely. Speaker 1
Yeah. And I remember, like, oh, God. I don't know how many times we would see her walking around with a bag on her head because she's was doing her roots. Yeah. Yeah. Not until late did she let let it go. Yeah. Oh, how old was she? Maybe in her seventies? Did she finally Yeah. I Speaker 2
think so. Speaker 1
She gave herself a really short, short haircut, like a pixie cut, and it looked so good. Yeah. And it was just all kind of salt and pepper, and then she just let it grow out that way. Speaker 0
Wow. Gorgeous. Yeah. You know, you know, the other thing about about aging, like traditionally for hair, my Danish, grandmother called her Famwa, which is Danish for father's mother. And she had fine hair. She didn't have a lot of gray, so she didn't color it. She would rinse her hair with chamomile tea. But, so it was almost like tea staining her hair, which is interesting, but she liked to get a perm. And my grandmother also always had poodles. And when I became a hairstylist, she wanted me to perm her hair and I personally do not like perms. And so my grandmother was literally the last person that I permed, somebody's hair for. But I remember saying to her like, Famwa, why do you want to look like your poodle? And it was actually after that that she decided to no longer perm her hair. So that's that's good. I feel like I, you know, as we're getting older, it's like, you know, you see so many people that are bracing their gray and silver natural textures. And I always say it's like to each their own, but Sandy, your hair is like stunning. So, I want I want to touch base on your your acting and just, like a lot of the roles that you've played and, just kind of over the years, like, how have you found it being in this industry on camera and getting older? I mean, I've I've caught you on a couple of the things that you've done, and you look great. But do you feel any kind of like pressures of, you know, you see, you see women that are getting things done? And, and, just how do you feel about that? Speaker 1
Sometimes I think, oh, if I can afford it. But I do find so I've been doing it for just about twelve years. And in the beginning, I felt I I found that it was always Latina made, Latina made. I like, all the auditions were all very much like that. Now it's it's changed completely. It they you see a lot of BIPOC, BIPOC, BIPOC. They wanna see a mix of cultures, which is amazing. So I've been able to go in for for different things. But when I went in, I I did a show where I played, the aunt, Latina aunt, and they put a wig on me because she wouldn't have her hair this color. So they put a put a really huge wig on. It was so big I I named it Loretta. Speaker 0
That's really great too, just just the capability now because I know, like, years ago, you would be asked to color your hair for a part. Right? Whereas now the fact that wigs are so much more accessible. And I I I wanna, like, I wanna push you to tell it in your own words, but you're telling me the story about this a list actress that you were in a scene with. Speaker 1
Oh, yes. Yeah. So this was, we were in Montreal, doing The Glass Castle was the name of the the film. And it was so hot, and it was being shot in, an old hospital in Montreal that they don't even use anymore and didn't have any air conditioning. And they would run-in these huge I don't even know what to call them. Speaker 0
Yes. Yes. Yes. So they're like industrial air conditioners. Speaker 1
And I was in high menopause at that time. And they would give you these little because everybody was hot. They they'd give you these little handheld fans that you would hold between takes or whatever. And they have me also in, I was in a wool dress and and a sweater and a wool cardigan. Speaker 0
So a menopausal nightmare. You were in the middle of a menopausal nightmare. I'm not. Speaker 1
Plus the, like, the heightened excitement of being on set. And I was on set with Woody Harrelson and Naomi Watts. Those are the scene partners. And, Naomi saw me, and she could see what was happening. And I she did something that I couldn't do. I'm gonna cry about it. She asked me to take a break. She said, we all need a break right now. Because she knew that I couldn't do that. I can't believe that it's affecting me, but it was so beautiful that she did that. Speaker 0
I mean, it's such it's such a great story. You know what? She's known for being such a strong voice with for women. Right? Yeah. And, and so that's amazing that she saw that. And, yeah, because you're right. Like, you know, when you're I don't I don't were you were you a day player or were you to be like a smaller part on a on a film set, you can't yell cut. Speaker 1
No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Yeah. She yeah. She was fantastic. I love that she did that and coming from a theater background, we always do thank you cards at the end of a run. So I gave I gave cards to everybody that I worked with from hair makeup, everybody. I give them a card And so I gave her a card and I thanked her for that. Speaker 0
Oh, that is such a when you first told me that story, and I was I think I think it was then where I was like, will you please be on my podcast and tell the story? So, do you find, like, if you're on set with people that are having any kind of struggle that you're also kind of there for that person as well? Like, would just imagine that you would be. Speaker 1
Yes. Yeah. Definitely. Whether it's menopause or whether somebody is PMSing. I was with somebody once who was, it just seemed really out of character for them to be so upset, about something like to the point of crying and just being really, really hard on themselves. And so, they stopped, they asked her to step outside and then they sent me out to talk to her. So I went out and I asked her, when's your period? When was your last period? And she said it's supposed to be tomorrow, and that that that's why you're like this. Speaker 0
Yeah. And just yeah. For sure. Like, understanding what you're kind of going through. And I know when we're going through, like, perimenopause and menopause, it's probably a bit more of a roller coaster that we're going through. Plus, we're having to deal with, like, so many things around us. But you guys have each other, which which is great. You guys seem to have, like, a really great strong, like, sister, friendship, sisterhood. So how do you find how do you find the support, like, with each other? Speaker 2
Oh, gosh. If I didn't have my sister, I don't know what I would do. She's my biggest support, really. Yeah. You know, after losing my mom, our mom, I felt the menopause, all the symptoms just, like, came like, the day after she passed, I felt like all of a sudden these hot flashes were coming, and and it was horrible. And no one really talked about it to me, really. Now I've been seeing my doctor about issues for a while, and now I'm putting it all together that it was always, you know, perimenopause. And, so yeah. So after my mom and I can just hear my mom always. She never really talked about it either. All she would say was, you'll see. You'll see. So it's really sad to have my sister. She's, like, great support. She's always there for me. And, it's an it's it's amazing. Right? And even for us now, I find I'm being more open. Right? Yeah. Because my sister, I'm sure she's she's been through this a bit longer than me. Right? Speaker 1
I'm four years older than my sister. Speaker 2
Yeah. And, so so I'm just learning all of this and I'm like, wow, I've been through this for a while, and I actually just started HRT. So, hopefully, it'll help me. Speaker 0
It you know what? It's it's great though too because not only do you have each other, but it's also where there is a lot more conversation that's happening. You know? Like, not even just I mean, my podcast isn't necessarily about perimenopause or menopause, but, obviously, all of my guests have it, like, a little bit of a story to tell, which is great, but just to kind of have that conversation that's out there. Speaker 1
And it was kinda sad too because they would belittle it. Right? The in our family, the Latin side of it would, if somebody was acting out of swords, they would Speaker 2
say, oh, la meno. Like Speaker 0
Yeah. Speaker 1
She's got the meno. You know? Speaker 2
So Mental pause. Speaker 1
Yeah. Yeah. They would it was always It Speaker 0
sounds so nice, though, with that accent. Speaker 2
La meno. Yeah. We've always been super close. Always. My sister's always been there for me. She she helped teach me walk, talk. So Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We have a really close bond. And I think it's just getting closer Speaker 0
now that, Speaker 2
you know, our family's getting, like, lost their mom and, so, yeah, she's a real big support for me. And I hope I'm You Speaker 1
guys are. Oh, yes. She really is. Yeah. Yeah. That was a huge support. And who was with Presley when because her kids were were grown. She was a huge support with, with Presley. Definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 0
It's so nice. You know? I I have, I have a couple sisters, but we don't have that, that tight relationship, unfortunately. You know? It's sometimes feel a bit envious, you know, when they see you guys together or they're watching some show and they portray, like, sisters just, like, being best friends and and, you know, it's, it's so nice. It's so nice to see. Speaker 2
Whenever I hear somebody is, like, one of my daughter's friends now is pregnant, I'm like, oh, I hope they have another girl. Yeah. Speaker 1
Yeah. My my mom too was a big pusher of girls when everybody's pregnant. I hope you have a girl. And I think too, my mom really pushed the sisterhood and that she didn't have siblings at all. Speaker 0
Yeah. Speaker 1
And so she really, would always remind us, you know, that you're not your your friends, your sisters, your family. Like, it's it's important not not to, take that for granted. So she was always she always kept us really conscious of that for sure. Yeah. And there were times, you know, like, that we separated for a little bit. It was whatever the nineties when I moved downtown or whatever, and Kelly was having kids and but we always still stayed in touch always. Speaker 2
And now we're extremely close with our daughters. My daughter is my best friend, and your daughter is your best friend too. Right? Speaker 1
So Yeah. Speaker 0
That's so sweet. Kelly, all to your daughter? Speaker 2
My daughter just turned thirty in February. Speaker 1
Big wedding coming up. Yeah. Speaker 0
Oh, how's that? Speaker 2
It's exciting. It's kinda feels surreal. Like, it's, you know, it's not really happening. But this past weekend, we went and did some food tasting at the wedding venue. So now it's like, okay. This is this is real and exciting, and and I'm really happy for her. Her fiance is great. His family is great. So really happy for this next chapter in our lives, I guess. More memories, but, yeah, really happy. Speaker 1
And we try and keep keep all that the menopausal the hormonal stuff open with the girls as well. Yeah. Like Always. Hide it. Don't this is a hot flash. You know? Like Yeah. Speaker 0
Well, you know, it it's it's crazy because I've been doing more, of course, research and and everything. And, even just with perimenopause, like, that can actually start in your thirties, I learned recently, which is, I didn't even think that it would start that soon. Speaker 2
Yeah. It's crazy. It's crazy. Speaker 0
You could say to your daughter, congratulations on your winning. Now prepare yourself. Speaker 1
It didn't happen anything. Yeah. Speaker 0
Wow. So, Sandy, anything coming up for you? Do you have any any big, any big projects coming up? Speaker 1
Hopefully. I've had a couple of auditions last week. It is funny. When I'm not working, I'm I'm taking classes. This one girl in this exercise, they're just supposed to notice things about each other, and she said, you're a lot older than I am. And whereas at one point in my life, I would that might make me sad. It might make me mad. And I was like, yes. I am a lot older than I am. I was like, just like, that's right. Speaker 0
And so you're and you're like, and you better listen and respect your elder. Speaker 1
Yeah. And it's funny that when we were talking about hair and, and being on set, how it's changed. So in I I did a law and order in Toronto, the Toronto law and order, and they they did my hair twice because the person who did my hair first put it all like, tried to hide it all in, like, a like, a bun or, like, a beehivey kind of thing. And they sent me right back to hair and, took it all out. They wanted it out. They wanted it, like, just pulled back, like, just pulled back up on the sides, and they wanted to see it all, which I thought was awesome. Speaker 0
Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. They should be showing it off. It's gorgeous. Well, I and I did catch it when was it was that the one where you play you played a waitress? Speaker 1
Yes. Yeah. Waitress at the diner. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 0
Yeah. Which one hand you can understand because of what, like, waitresses, like, typically would have their hair pulled up, but it's also, like, it's TV. So Yeah. It's TV waitress hair. It doesn't have to be real. Speaker 1
Yeah. And I just, just before coming here, I got a check and it was for a commercial, a Walmart commercial. I love when that happens. Something that I did a while back. And then I love residuals. Oh, yes. Speaker 0
Well, say Sage, my, my eldest, she did a commercial when she was ten for Nutella And at seventeen, she was still getting some residuals. Yeah. Speaker 1
That's the same with the McDonald's. Yeah. Speaker 0
It doesn't always happen. So anyone that's listening, if they're like, oh, if I just get a commercial campaign, I'll get residuals. That doesn't always happen. Yeah. Yeah. And you do voiceover work too. Right? Speaker 1
Yes. I do. Yeah. And I can do it with a Spanish accent if you like it. I can do whatever you want me to do. Speaker 0
I love it. Speaker 1
And a and a book as well. I did an audiobook where I get to say a few words in Spanish as well. But I do sometimes when I do a, a self tape, if they are calling for a Latina, I'll do my second take with a Latina accent. Speaker 0
Oh, that's a good idea. Just a take. Not. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1
And it and it does do it does something different to the character. It makes the character a bit more ballsy, a bit more attitude. So and if I can throw in a few Spanish words in there, whatever I need to do to get the job. Speaker 0
Yeah. Amazing. It's so it's so great and I just love that you guys are so close and you have like like differences in your lives like having different paths but but still there for each other I think it's amazing. Yeah. Speaker 1
Very, very supportive of each other, for sure. Yeah. Speaker 0
Do you have, do you have any, any advice for, for anybody? I mean, I, I guess it's almost like you could pretend you're speaking to your own daughters. Like any advice that you would pass on to them as they're getting older? Speaker 1
I think something that we always forget is that we and it sounds kind of selfish just to say it, but we are number one. Right? That whole thing about, how can you love someone if you don't love yourself? All those kinds of sayings about there's something to be said about self love. It it takes you a long way in that, there's self respect there. You're you're more aware of yourself, your surrounding of others, of how you allow other people to treat you, just to really be kind to yourself. I think that is that is big. We sometimes forget that, especially, as women is watching my mom too, is that everybody came before her. Speaker 0
Yeah. Speaker 1
Right? Like, everyone came before her, kids, her husband, and she was always last. And it's like, but why? Speaker 0
Yeah. Speaker 1
It doesn't have to be like that. And I find that I'm a I'm a better person when I'm a a healthy happy person, and that means taking care of myself. But I don't take care of myself and I'm not a happy person. Speaker 0
Yeah. Yeah. I agree. I think definitely we have to put ourselves forward. I think I think too often we're kind of brought up, especially when we could become mothers, we're brought up to, like, you know, well, everyone else should go before us. Right? Yeah. So definitely, I think, I I I agree with you. I think we we should be putting ourselves forward. Speaker 2
Me turning fifties. Yeah. Totally. Yeah. Me first. I have to go and do my yoga. I have to go for a walk. I have to eat healthy. I have to really and that takes time. Right? Putting ourselves first. But if we take care of ourselves first, then we're great for everyone else. I I find is this Speaker 0
is this something that you guys had to kind of learn like did you did you? Yeah. Yeah. And is that because our Speaker 2
mother wasn't like that. She didn't. I didn't see her go to yoga every day or go for a walk every day. It was like my sister said, you know? Yeah. Speaker 0
Oh, I Speaker 2
have to cook dinner. I have to go to work after you know, it's just that regime of yeah. I don't know. It was it was awful really. Speaker 1
Yeah. There was sometimes in that maybe it was maybe the eighties. I remember seeing her in, a jogging suit, but made of plastic on a on an exercise bike. Yeah. Because of the whole, like, the whole body thing. Right? You had to be, in certain ways. So she's trying to lose weight by riding a bike in plastic. Speaker 0
So I remember when I was got eighties, for sure. I was not eighty. I was like, it was a it was the eighties. I'm just fifty four. But I I remember my stepmother, and I think it was either one of her friends or maybe, my step aunt, they had wrapped themselves. So they I think they put some cream or something on their body first. I'm not sure what it was, but then they wrapped themselves with saran wrap, head to toe. Well, maybe not head. Maybe maybe, like, you know, neck to toe. And then they put a tracksuit on over top of that. Yeah. Just sweat it out. That's like so crazy. And then the funny thing is, I mean, I wanna say not funny. The fucked up thing is, as you would kind of drop a tiny little bed, but God forbid you have a glass of water because all that shit is right back on again. Like the things that we put ourselves through, it's like, it's insane. Yeah. And then it's funny because we remember that. Right? We remember, like, seeing what what, you know family around us did and I'm family let's be specific like the the women that mentors around us like this is what we saw as our example right so I think it's great that you're I mean I'm so sorry that your your mother had passed but it's also nice that you can kind of take away what you wish that she would have had, where you're like, this is the example I now wanna showcase for my, you know, younger generation can see, like, it's okay to put yourself first and not sweat with a plastic bag. Speaker 1
Yeah. She was happy with us that we did that we would do that. But Yeah. She at the end, she saw that that this was really important. And it was seeing her not take care of herself made us wanna take care of ourselves even more. Yeah. Because we didn't wanna go down that that road of Yeah. Unhealthiness. Yeah. Speaker 0
Do you do you have any kind of new, like, new hobbies or anything? I mean, you're talking, Kelly, about yoga. Is that or have you guys always done yoga? Is this something new? Or Speaker 2
for me, gosh. I guess it's been maybe ten years, but it was actually my daughter that got me into it. She's she, you know, kept trying to get me to go with her, and I kept saying, no. I'm too old for that. You know? Following my mom's footsteps, I guess. And she's like, no, mom. There's people older than you there. So that's how I got, and then I fell in love with it. But hobbies, actually, I just recently started painting again. I was always very artsy artsy Speaker 1
and Crafty. Speaker 2
Yeah. And so I'm getting back into that to help me in in these later years. Speaker 1
She's painting these beautiful stones to put in our garden that that are yeah. That's gorgeous. And she you'd taken mom. My my mom was an amazing seamstress. She would always sew all of our Halloween costumes and, you know, made their jeans tighter in the eighties. Yeah. But, so you have her sewing machine. So we're gonna be having some some sewing Speaker 2
Yeah. Speaker 1
Sewing weekends, hopefully, to to show Kelly how to use the machine, and maybe that'll be your next hobby. Yeah. Yeah. But I I do find I did find that yoga made it a huge I I did just, like, regular yoga and then found hot yoga, and then that made a huge difference with, the menopause and perimenopause. Huge difference. Speaker 0
So maybe maybe our parents were kind of onto something when they were wrapping themselves in plastic. This is like a healthier version of that. Speaker 1
Yeah. Imagine having a hot flash covered in plastic. Speaker 2
Oh my god. I mean, some Speaker 0
of the clothes you get from, like, some of these, like, fast fashion designers are, like, covering yourself in plastic. So Speaker 1
I'm wondering too if it was around that time that she was going through perimenopause and couldn't lose weight. Right? Because you you put on weight so easily once Yeah. You get when you start getting older, and I'm wondering if that was what she was fighting against or dealing with. Speaker 0
You know, it it's so it's so interesting because, touching on that and that's like, I've had I've had, I think, I mean, I could probably count them. I think I've had four people ask me if I'm gonna ever have somebody on to talk about weight loss and I'm like, like, basically the easy answer is fuck no. I think if it's part of somebody's like journey, like, absolutely, like, let's like share your story or I would love to have a dietitian on just to talk about healthy eating. And I know that could kind of transpire from from that and and just not even just healthy eating, but just like, like things like different foods that we can eat as we're kind of getting older that may be, or, you know, better for our bodies, whatever. But, but yeah, it's, it's like, it's like the, the weight, like just the way our body kind of carries it differently as we get older, you know? And, so that, that would be interesting if your mom was wrapping herself up in saran wrap or whatever the plastic that she was like using that if that was Speaker 2
part of the cause. I was always doing the fad diets that's Speaker 1
bad diets all the time yeah it was sad for sure yeah, and I noticed too with the perimenopause and menopause that I had to cut out some of my favorite things to eat and drink because it made a huge difference too. Wow. So, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 0
Oh, getting older. Isn't it like so much fun? Speaker 1
It really is. Speaker 2
It really is. It really is. Speaker 1
You start, like, you give less bumps. You really do. Yeah. And I think that's one of my favorite things. Speaker 2
That is my favorite thing. Around fifty years, I no longer give a fuck. Speaker 0
Oh my god. I love it. I think that is a perfect point to leave on is, like, we just don't give any fucks. No. All the fucks are they're gone. Yeah. Thank you guys so much. I really appreciate Speaker 1
our chat. Speaker 2
Thank you. Speaker 0
I'll drop off some of the Speaker 2
other soon. Speaker 1
Yeah. Please. Yes. And best I Speaker 0
could be spicy. I can take advice. Speaker 2
Thank you so much. You too. It was great. Speaker 0
Thanks for tuning in to the fuck you fifties. If you enjoyed this episode, please take a moment to follow and rate the podcast. And we'd love to connect with you on Instagram, so be sure to follow us at the fuck you fifties. The fuck you fifties is hosted by Andrea Clare and edited and produced by Bespoke Productions Hub. See you next time. 